writing week 11

This week we have been writing 2 paragraphs for the story we wrote last week this is mine. The pink and purple highlighted paragraphs are the ones I wrote this week. 

It was an icy cold day in Southern Antarctica. There was a glowing, white polar bear on a slice of slippery ice, just off the shore of Southern Antarctica. His name was Snowy, he had drifted all the way from the freezing cold icy north pole. It was a long cold lonely ride, he dined on Sardines and Squid. When he bit into them they made a squelching sound and were really chewy since they were not cooked in a burning oven. He was so excited because he could see land that looked cold and icy. The rushing waves started pulling him faster. The ice piece was quite small now so he had to hold on tight, if he let go he would die because he cannot swim. Then he saw an iceberg. 

The iceberg was a lot bigger and wider than the one he was currently on, he wanted to make the jump but it was big and he was too little to be able to go in the icy cold water. But he was gonna fall in if he stayed on his slippery iceberg. He decided to jump but it was an 8 meter jump. He tried to jump but he didn't make it; he fell into the crystal blue icy water. It was 50 meters deep, he fell down 25 meters in a whopping 10 seconds. And 40 meters in a fast 15 seconds. By the time 20 seconds had struck he was at the bottom with such fear that he couldn't move. 

 Snowy was whelping and weeping at the bottom of the crystal blue water almost out of air, but then a miracle happened. His mother saw him. She didn't know it was him but she was lovely and risked her life to save her baby. By the time snowys mother was 25 meters down she was already out of breath but she kept going to save her beloved baby. She was about to quit at 40 meters but then she saw his face and tears flooded down her face in happiness. She was really struggling to get to the bottom, She was running out of breath, she didn't think she was gonna make it, but she had this drive inside of her that made her want to get to the bottom of the sea. Maybe it was because she was saving her baby or maybe it was because only 3 animals had ever made it to the bottom.  She grabbed on to snowy almost about to let go out of tiredness and no air she got to the top and snowy grabbed onto the slippery iceberg with his hole family his sisters, father and brother, but his mother didn't make it she ran out of breath and had sunk down 40 meters by the time her family noticed.